Children, violence and vulnerability 2025
REPORT 2
Violence in relationships
Relationship abuse impacts too many teenage children’s day-to-day lives.
Teenage years are often when children first begin to explore romantic relationships. At their best, these can bring joy, companionship and important lessons about trust. But for too many, they are marked instead by control, pressure or violence – experiences that can undermine their safety and affect their daily life.
This year, 28% of the teenage children we surveyed told us they’d been in a relationship in the past 12 months. Of those, nearly two in five (39%) had experienced some form of emotional or physical abuse – the equivalent of over one in ten of all teenagers, or 390,000 13-17-year-olds across England and Wales. For the 36% who reported forms of emotional abuse, behaviours ranged from partners checking their phone or monitoring their location to criticism of their body or appearance. Even more concerning, 15% said they’d been subjected to physical or sexual abuse – including being forced or pressured into sex, physically hurt or having explicit images of them shared online.
Most teens who experienced these behaviours said it affected their day-to-day lives – from feeling anxious, low or bad about themselves, to struggling to sleep, eat or concentrate. More than a third said it strained relationships with friends or family, and over one in five avoided school or college because of something that happened with a partner. In some areas, the impact was felt more strongly by girls, who were more likely to say the abusive behaviours damaged their self-esteem or led them to change their appearance.
It’s common for both girls and boys.
Our findings reinforce why lessons on healthy relationships are so important for all teenagers. Although girls were slightly more likely to experience emotional or physical abuse from a partner than boys, the difference was small (41% experienced by girls compared to 37% by boys).
The types of experiences differed by gender. Girls were more likely to say their partner made them feel they couldn’t leave, made them afraid to disagree, criticised their appearance, or pressured them into sex. Boys, meanwhile, were more likely to report having explicit images of themselves posted online.
Differences also appeared when teens reflected on their own behaviour towards their partners. Girls were more likely to admit checking their partner’s phone or social media and tracking their location. Boys were more likely to report trying to control who their partner saw, making them afraid to disagree, criticising their appearance, pressuring them into sex or posting explicit images.
Teens who view sexual aggression as acceptable are more likely to commit relationship abuse.
Encouragingly, most 13-17-year-olds rejected harmful attitudes: 86% said it’s never OK to pressure someone into dating or sex when they’ve already said no, with just 5% saying it was sometimes or always acceptable.
Exposure to harmful content online was associated with more permissive attitudes and behaviours. Teens who had seen sexually violent content on social media were significantly more likely to say pressuring someone into sex after refusal was acceptable (8% compared to 5% overall). While we can’t say whether harmful content directly influences children’s understanding of what’s OK to do in relationships, or whether those with certain views are more likely to seek out or be suggested harmful content, the association is troubling.
What works to prevent violence in relationships
Evidence shows that education can make a real difference. A global review found that specialist lessons, delivered by trained and confident staff, can reduce relationship violence by around 17%. Bystander intervention programmes also show promise — teaching teenagers how to safely step in during situations of potential sexual assault. Those who take part are not only more confident about intervening but also less likely to commit sexual violence themselves.